Archive: Another Way to Pray: Straight-Up Honesty (Part 2)

Originally presented 02/10/2008
by Doug Hammack

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Coming to God in face of painful circumstances is a deep act of faith. Because these are heroic acts of spirituality… (and because we often need baby steps before heroic steps)
To be successful in these new practices, we need to develop the spiritual pattern of coming to God as honestly as we can during those times that are not as demanding. There is something in this simple first movement of prayer that takes us to the center of ourselves. When we become immersed in our own identity we become candidates for the experience of God.

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One Response to Archive: Another Way to Pray: Straight-Up Honesty (Part 2)

  1. nrccadmin says:

    Let’s review where we are
    At the very beginning of the last lesson, I told you a story about how a pure spiritual truth got polluted
    • And all people did to corrupt this truth was think about it naturally, concretely
    • But over time this truth, this belief, once pure became corrupt
    • This belief was that after one dies…
    • the goodness of God is sufficient to fully purge and purify our souls for an eternity of union w/ God

    But over time, that belief was corrupted to the place that it engendered manipulation, guilt, and fear

    And then we said how in our own time, some of our own deep cherished spiritual beliefs may have been likewise corrupted
    • Our beliefs may not be as pure as we’d like them to be
    • And one corrupted belief may be what we think about prayer
    • Our simple belief that prayer gets God to do stuff, may be tainted
    • Incomplete in some applications
    • Corrupted and toxic in others
    So, I suggested a different fundamental assumption about prayer
    • That the belief that prayer gets God to do stuff becomes less helpful the further we walk on the spiritual journey
    • And that as we mature, as we progress, prayer becomes more about discerning what God is already doing, is already up to

    And then I said…
    • if we have a different starting assumption about prayer
    • we’ll develop different practices built on that assumption

    Whereas, we have a whole set of practices that have built up on the assumption that prayer gets God to do stuff…
    • We don’t have many practices that have built on trying to discern what God is already doing, has already done

    So we started w/ a suggestion of what a first practice might be
    • And it was simple
    • It didn’t have many moving parts, wasn’t that complex
    • In fact, in its simplicity, it seems almost dismissable

    It was this
    • Come to God
    • Be as honest as you can with where you are

    That’s it
    That’s the first movement in prayer built in a different assumption
    • Come to God
    • Be as honest as you can w/ where you are

    We looked at a category of ancient prayers that worked on this assumption
    • Ancient prayers of a similar genre
    • The category was called psalms of lament
    • In each of them, the pray-er would simply… come to God
    • And we saw what a tremendous step of faith that is
    • There are hundreds reasons to avoid God in midst of tough times
    • Our emotions are stacked against the act of coming to God
    • Our logic arrays reason after reason in resistance to the simple act

    But people of faith; People of the spiritual journey
    …Come to God

    But second, they do so honestly
    • They don’t buy into the religious mumbo jumbo of should, supposed to, have to
    • They don’t spend their efforts trying to speak the right words, say the right phrases, utter the right incantations
    • No, they speak as honestly as they can about where they are

    We looked at one ancient prayer as an illustration
    • A prayer, heroic in its faith posture: Ps. #13
    • This was prayer of a man in torment, torture, tumult, upheaval
    • And yet, he came to God in middle of his hardship

    Long enough, God
    Long enough you’ve ignored, me, ignored my plight
    Long enough the load of trouble on my back
    Long enough the stomach full of pain
    Take a look at me! Don’t ignore me!
    I look to you to rescue me, but what I get is unanswered prayers!

    And, we said…
    Coming to God in face of circumstances this painful is deep act of faith
    • A deeply spiritual act
    • A deeply honest, and deeply sacred act of spirituality

    However, it’s also a very demanding act; very difficult
    • It is hard, in the face of challenging circumstances, to come to God
    • It is very difficult, in the face of pain and mayhem, to be as honest with God as we are able

    So, we said…
    Because these are heroic acts of spirituality….
    • And because we often need baby steps before heroic steps…
    • To be successful in these new practices, we need to develop the spiritual pattern of coming to God
    • Of being as honest as we can…
    …during those times that are not as demanding

    So I gave an illustration of a much simpler prayer
    • I told you about the prayer of a spiritual leader for one in his community who was facing a hard time
    • All primed for the right religious words to come out
    “O Lord, may Mary stay close to You in the midst of this trial…”
    “O Lord, deliver Mary from the …”
    • And he caught himself…

    If prayer is a dance, I’m not dancing
    • If prayer is a call/response, I’m not calling or responding
    • I’m just wound up, ready w/ a barrage of “God do this” words
    • I have no idea what God is already doing
    • I have no idea what God is up to
    • I have not made the first movement of prayer as dancing w/ God
    • I have not come to God
    • I have not been as honest as I can with where I am

    And so, I read you this second prayer.
    • much less famous than David’s
    • A prayer offered in less demanding circumstances
    • A prayer that acts as a training exercise
    • A training in the first movement of prayer built on a different assumption
    • The assumption that God is already doing something
    • And prayer is how I get in tune with what is already going on

    And that prayer simply reported the state of the pray-er
    • God I like Mary
    • And I’ve got a fix-it impulse inside me
    • I want to make her problem go away
    • Perhaps there’s some part of me that wants to be a hero
    • Or just be useful, or to matter
    • But that’s where I am
    • And I have no idea what You’re up to in Mary’s life

    It’s was a prayer that began the first movement in learning to dance

    Let me give you another example…
    From that book I told you would be a good text during this msg
    Larry Crabb
    Just last night we got word that the son of close friends is taking his first step out of a pigpen of living he’s been in for a long time. Our first impulse was to pray, “God, thanks for answering prayers for this kid, and, please, turn his life around.”
    We care deeply for this family, but neither of us had much energy for that kind of familiar prayer. We stopped ourselves and decided to try to pray relationally.
    Rachael told God how hopeful she felt. I told God that I was cautiously excited. That was the beginning of our conversation with God. It was how we presented ourselves to God. It took about five minutes to think about it, discern it, and say it to God.

    The prayer practices built on the assumption that God is already doing something and we don’t have to get Him moving…
    • These practices begin simply
    • We come to God
    • We start off being real
    • We become people w/o pretense
    • We engage w/ God with whatever is going on inside us that we can identify

    Jesus invited us to this kind of spiritual dynamic
    • Come to Me, he said…
    • When you’re worn out
    • When life isn’t working for you…
    • And come with no need to tidy life up before you do
    • It’s ok to admit that you’re not so good
    • That you’re disappointed in God, in life, in yourself

    It’s ok to admit that you can’t keep up the good person façade
    • Sometimes you wonder if I am a good God, that’s ok
    • Sometimes you hate me. That’s ok too.

    We often say: “better to be authentic sinner than inauthentic saint”
    • When we admit to ourselves who we are, where we are…
    • We are taking the first step to the dance

    But remaining an authentic sinner isn’t the point either
    • It’s just miles ahead of the religious play-acting some of our assumptions about prayer have led us to practice

    We need to admit where we are
    • Admit who we are
    • And then present ourselves honestly to God

    When we’ve done this for a time, we come to the place we can present our deepest longings to God
    • We can present our greatest fears with equal assurance

    There is something in this simple first movement of prayer that takes us to the center of ourselves
    • It is in that context of being our truest selves that we can begin the dance

    When we become immersed in our own identity we become candidates for the experience of God
    • But part of the human condition is an internal, intuitive sense that there is something terribly wrong with us
    • So we avoid being directly honest even w/ ourselves
    • And in so doing, we shut ourselves off from the experience of God
    • Settling for religious ritual and perfunctory prayers that let us off the hook

    But if we will face down our unspoken fears…
    • Which this first movement of prayer invites us to do…
    • If we will begin the journey by coming to God…
    • And being as honest as we can with where we are…

    we also, will find what the ancients described…
    • a God able to forgive that deep sense of failure we feel inside
    • a God who repairs that deep sense of something wrong…
    that deep sense that something needs fixing
    that part of us we work so hard to compensate for
    • by being successful in work, successful in family, successful in ministry

    we discover, in this first movement in prayer…
    • a door that opens into the redemption we believe is in Christ
    • the acceptance we believe is in the father of the prodigal
    • the restoration we believe in found in our God
    for men, the deep inner thing we’re running from is often a deep nagging question: am I adequate?
    • does my life matter?
    • Can I handle the challenges life presents?
    • Am I a man?
    • Do I have the substance of being to affect a woman, a family, the marketplace?

    And in the dance, ancients men found these questions addressed

    For women, the deep questions is often related to cherish-ability
    • Am I beautiful? Not just of body, but is my substance beautiful?
    • Do I possess an internal reality that makes an external impact
    • A force that draws others to cherish, to honor

    Women often fear nothing is unique about them
    • Nothing worthy of esteem
    • Am I beautiful, or merely useful?
    • Am I merely a resource to serve someone else’s purpose?
    • And the corollary: will I be able to connect deeply with anyone?
    • Will anyone see my beauty?

    And like men, ancient women found the answers to these questions in the dance
    • In coming to God
    • And being as honest as they could with where they were

    As men and women, we struggle w/ these deep fears, terrors
    And we’ve developed clever strategies to keep them at bay
    • Men don’t like to wonder if they are adequate
    • Women don’t like to wonder if they have beauty
    • So we do everything we can to avoid the questions altogether
    And the first movement of prayer directly challenges all those lifelong, clever strategies
    • We’ve been numbing our terror for a life time
    • Why in the world, would we come to God and start being honest?
    • It just stirs up a hornet’s nest of pain and hellishness

    But men, God has made us uniquely adequate (and women too)
    And women, God has made us uniquely beautiful (and men too)

    And the ancients discovered that which is the deepest human longing in the dance
    • And the first movement of that dance
    • Come to God
    • Be as honest as you can w/ who/where you are

    So invite you today to this simple little exercise

    Come this week, to God
    Be as honest as you can w/ who/where you are

    It’s a seemingly trivial exercise
    But it is a deeply spiritual one

    Start where you are
    • Lord, I’m bored w/ the sameness of my days
    • Lord, I’m distracted by things that even I recognize are trivial
    • But they have to happen, don’t they?
    • Lord, I’m on hair trigger w/ my spouse, and don’t even know why

    And if you have trouble looking inside at who you are, get help
    Talk to friends, sometimes that helps.

    Come to God this week
    Be as honest as you can with who you are